Buddhism

All religions end up being just too damn hard. Metta is loving kindness it is the way an arihant defeats anger. Karuna is compassion the way to defeat cruelty. Medutha (?) is empathic joy the way to overcome hatred, and Upeksha the crown in the jewel is Equanimity. I find it easier to ignore the world and concentrate on Syriac though apparently all this does is plunge the samskara deeper into the body.

So good news. The Anthony Chantry the Superior General has taken up my complaint against Paul Father. I did worry about that. The guy is a dodgy Injun. Now many westerners don't give to chaaarity because of stories about men like Paul. But in the end he built a hostel for tribal kids, he befriended them, it's not like anyone else had ever known or cared about them. Ok so he has got a bit bored by it all. And he don't get the fascination with one tribal amputee (for that kind of money desie I could get you ten heck twenty with all their limbs or one very interesting one with three extra arms but the Hindus are driving the price up on that one). But that's because he is Ignorant. Buddhists don't judge you see but you are allowed to call people Ignorant if it's genuinely out of compassion. Ok so mine isn't out of genuine compassion but i think of it as progressive ahimsa on the verbal level. Sort of like SALT talks. No neutron bombs and a 50megatonne cap on individual warheads. So anyway now the complaint has been taken up not my headache at all. Now might be some smugness here but I don't wish the headache on Paul. If he really is not bovverred do I look bovverred, I have no intention of pressing the matter. I'll give the settlement from TVU to Fr Jose and Irom without specifiying how they spend it, that way cannily enough they can never disappoint or redirect funds because I gave them carte blanche anyway.


At last Syriac classes, it's like the priests were trying to embarrass me in front of the hottie in the class, not told what to prepare just handed three sheets and expected to guess. I still managed to sight read, now I don't think it was competently but I could parse the sentences and I'd pass if it were an exam and I was sight reading not prepared translation. So Friday should be a breeze and I'll concentrate on catch up before pressing ahead over the next few weeks. It's nice to get actuall classroom time especially since it's not too long one hour classes three times a week.

Yep I know I want to be an Arihant having destroyed the enemies of hatred anger cruelty etc but if I can concentrate on sitting still for longer periods that's a start. And Syriac is a good find. I was getting a little depressed at how bitter I was becoming over the money thing. But there's a lot to be said for taking my cash and then going on the run, even if it is in one place where it's more nobody wants to come rather than nobody knows where I am.

I don't need that much money. It was surprising to discover how alone I really was once my mother died. But I've had time to accustomize so it should be less surprising.