Last day of Dharmaram Memorial Lecture ting

I think I'll move on to Derrida and Merleau-Ponty and some guy called Adolpho someting like that very revolutionary and yet hard to grasp aren't they all. But one more little rant. Art forsakes the prey for its shadow. Wickedness and magic the despised tricks of the devil are enshrined as altars in poetry. I am sure Burrgraeve will say what he meant was, but what he meant was is not that at all. Il y a is the residue of existence heard as background noise when you place the seashell given you by your pearl diving former lover to your ear. He does mention insomnia but it's described in extensive quotes from the Scottish Play and then he slags off art as idolatrous and Shakespeare as overintellectual.

I think I'll try nab Burrgraeve when I see him next on campus. The really interesting ideas are the tangents. But for all his talk of Rabinnic Temples of Qabalistic Hermeneutic I think all he'll want after the last lecture ends is to get laid get drunk and sell some more double glazing unless coco is available for an early night, why should he be any different from the rest of us. But I'll nab him and find out for sure if opportunity allows.

And instead of being unhappy here I reflected it's a hell of a lot more like home than the last place I was at. Praxis humanizing activity is what makes a dwelling a home. And the direction of travel is better here for now. In fact all I think I have to do to ensure comfort here is to hang on to a few thousand rupees in me wallet. Which leads me to the counterintuitive urge to give all my money away.

It was that monthly recollection priest what did that I am sure the feeling will pass once I find myself a decent pastry. All predators even a carrion animal will allow others to eat a corpse once they have had their fill. Give from your want or you are just a sated carrion animal. He was a fundamentalist charismatic with a sense of humour my kind of priest. Why can't they heal lepers and raise the dead, why rather do they carry a purse and two coats hmmm. He told some good yarns. One was when he was in Amurka studying he had no parish duties so assisted at his mass of a Sunday. He explained the way westerners come for blessings with arms crossed as well as for the eucharist. (I don't think Indians get the whole I came for the feast but I am not eating they'd assume you had come to insult them). So this five yr old kid comes with hands out begging for a host. A woman behind says no Father he has not had his first communion. So he goes on administering to the other lines. But the kids stays there begging with his hand outstretched. The humour was, well I wasn't under any Bishop, I was free in that sense. So I thought do I have the right to refuse this boy who is begging for the Lord. He prayed and then asked the boy to open his mouth and he placed the host on his tongue and thought no more of it. Later the grandmother telephones and you can write the rest but he saved a marriage and won souls for Christ yeehaw. Almost makes you want to believe. Of course I believe, but not in that literal naive way, I am trying to believe in a post-phenomenological way, tell me of this way Derrida Merleau-Ponty and you other guys that I may believe.

I got an email from the Park Guest House attached to the Sri Aurobindo Ashram in Pondicherry saying not to worry I should only pay for the days I spend with them I had booked a week and will stay only four days. Now the thing is it's never that much money here. Whatever I do or buy. I can be ripped off or get an extraordinarily generous bargain but take the week at Pondicherry, more could fall out of a hole in your trysers in Ealing and you wouldn't think twice of it. I almost went off into a rant about how dare they not allow me to attend the counselling classes and the special masses do they not realize I am paying double the normal fees until I realized it wouldn't buy you one night with one of Berlusconi's hostesses and I am pretty sure if you want sex it's gonna cost a lot more and not just money.

I think I am happy as a gyrovague, the bus shall be my cell, after a few hours the back plays up a little but if I can get to sleep. The worry is the term semi-sleeper. It's like semi-virginity. Probably means something only to Levinas. Ah well toodle pip I'd like to get a nice seat right at the back so have to leave now.